Top 5 Salads

This article covers the top 5 salads. That's it. 5 really good salads. 

Head Rush

I'd like to take this time to talk about the top 5 salads in existence. 

 

#5. Mediterranean Salad

This is a very solid salad year-round. Cucumbers ensure a satisfying crunch while feta cheese, olives and red onions make for some very dynamic flavor combinations. Just an absolute treat alongside a great gyro. 

 

#4. Pasta Salad

Another terrific year-round salad that isn't the healthiest, but boy is it tasty. Most grocery stores versions are heavy on the Italian dressing though, so watch out. Best when using several different types of meat, but we could do without artichokes. 

 

#3. Egg Salad

A contentious choice for some, but a great homemade egg salad is very hard to beat. This panel of judges strongly considering a higher placement, but Egg Salad just doesn't have the complexity or nuance that our first two placements offer.

 

#2. Watermelon, Feta & Cucumber Salad

A close cousin to #5, this salad is always a winner at picnics and patios during warm weather. A healthy dose of mint and feta can make this an absolute winner, but don't let it sit too long in the fridge before serving. 

#1.  Cobb Salad

Where do we start with the Cobb salad? This dish has it all: chicken, egg, avocado, bacon, tomatoes, bleu cheese and more. Is it sometimes more calories than a giant burger on a restaurant menu? Absolutely, yes. The flavors, though, are absolutely incredible. Is it the perfect salad? We think so. 

 

Honorable Mention: Taco Salad

Dishonorable Mention: Jello Salad

From The Chatty
  • reply
    March 25, 2021 5:24 PM

    Head Rush wrote a thing!

    Read more: Top 5 Salads

    • reply
      March 25, 2021 5:27 PM

      no "Toss My"?

      • reply
        March 25, 2021 5:27 PM

        Too easy. Plus I thought I'd leave that for mojoald.

        • reply
          March 25, 2021 5:28 PM

          Look my bit is posting essays from AP Lit from 2000, you do your own thing.

    • reply
      March 25, 2021 5:28 PM

      Taco salad got robbed

      • reply
        March 25, 2021 5:30 PM

        Taco Salad was left off because execution can vary so wildly. The best taco salad is great, but the worst taco salad is worse than anything else on the list. I'm talking about a gross taco shell, iceberg lettuce and some ground beef with shredded cheese.

    • reply
      March 25, 2021 5:35 PM

      Respectable. Very respectable. I'd probably preplace Mediterranean with Caesar, and Egg with Potato. I feel like these changes significantly increase the whiskey tango rating of the overall list, but I'll own it.

      • reply
        March 25, 2021 5:38 PM

        A very thoughtful approach from the distinguished gentleman. Potato is an excellent choice but can suffer the same fate as bad taco salads. A red potato, bacon, scallion, bleu cheese salad is A+++ though.

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      March 25, 2021 6:00 PM

      Med salad all the way. They all look nice, though.

    • reply
      March 25, 2021 6:15 PM

      Japanese/Korean seaweed salad is in that list yes??? :)

      • reply
        March 25, 2021 9:03 PM

        I order this regularly and while it's always enjoyable, it does not have a place on Mount Saladmore.

    • reply
      March 25, 2021 6:33 PM

      No Ambrosia? I demand a recount!

    • reply
      March 25, 2021 6:38 PM

      I had an amazing cobb salad at the Westin In Boston. I haven't experienced a salad like that again ever in my life, even though I order cobb salads everywhere after that time. It never came close.

      I wish I could travel to boston again (after pandemic) and have that cobb salad again.

    • reply
      March 25, 2021 6:53 PM

      A good Cobb is worth its weight in gold

    • reply
      March 25, 2021 7:20 PM

      Porky’s Top Ten Thread-jack with the next 5 Top Salads!

      6. Irish Hoof Stew. Nubile goats have their hooves clipped off with garden shears for this classic Irish salad. A hearty meal for anyone working in the field. Slow stewed in a lead lined kettle filled drain water, Irish whiskey and malt, this dish is served in a pint glass and chased down with a shot of Irish Whiskey. Erin go Bra!

      7. North Korean Glue Stew. When the police are coming and you have only moments to dispense of the fake ids you obtained to finally escape this oppressive country. Think fast and put a pot of water in the stove. This doesn’t take long so you’ll only need one shoe to burn in the stove. Throw those ids into the water now! You only have a few minutes. Once the glue and laminate break down in the boiling water, Your salad is ready. Remember to smile as you wrestle to eat the now rubbery ID cards with chopsticks. If the police detect one note of sadness you are looking at jail time!

      8. Kentucky Kettle Stew. Pretty straight forward salad any beginner can make. All you need is fentanyl and a cooker. I usually go for the 50 gallon milled steel barrel, bronze flange, doesn’t corrode as easily. One weekend of cooking will give you generally enough salad to sell for a month (if your clientele are women, maybe 1 week tops.) Put 20% back into fentanyl purchases and you are looking golden.

      9. Wuhan Bat Bouillabaisse. The salad that brought the world to its knees. The salad so irresistible and tempting it had to be tried. First you are going to need some bats. A lot of bats. You know those flying disease ridden rodents that live in disease ridden caves? That’s what you want. Then you want to boil the bats. Hard boil. About 5 hours. Until the proteins break down so hard you are left with pure RNA ready to foist itself into whatever breathing husk it can inhabit. Top this salad with a little Sichuan peppercorn - *chefs kiss*

      10. Burrito Stew.

    • reply
      March 25, 2021 7:42 PM

      You got me. I was reading this like "lol" until I hit the Watermelon + Feta + Cucumber, then I found myself nodding vigorously and saying things like "why yes, good chap" and "MY MAN" and interrupting my wife to show this article to her.

      And then to finish with the Cobb! Such a powerful mix of complimentary tastes. I'm in. It's time for salad.

      • reply
        March 25, 2021 9:00 PM

        I know you are both people of impeccable taste, so this makes sense!

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      March 25, 2021 7:44 PM

      I don't see lobster. You're fired

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      March 25, 2021 9:54 PM

      man egg salad is fucking amazing... i wish i could make a tub full of it and just fucking bathe in it until i died it's so good

    • reply
      March 26, 2021 12:19 AM

      pasta salad what? no thx.

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