5 Strange Things to Love About The Witcher 3

The Witcher 3 may be one of the best role-playing games around, but it too is subject to certain strange quirks. But these weird features can end up being some of the best parts of the game. 


The Witcher 3 is turning out to be one of the greatest and deepest role-playing games of the year. But, like many other games, it has strange and absurd quirks that make the game even more enjoyable.

Geralt's Amazing Beard

Being a mutant bestows certain abilities onto Witchers like Geralt. Chief among them appears to be rapid hair growth. This Witcher can head over the barber in Oxenfurt (in Velen), have his beard cleanly shaven off in the morning, and have it almost fully return by early evening. There's even a free DLC pack dedicated to different hair and beard styles. The only way the beard could become more amazing is if it actually had protective properties, like making werewolves think that you're one of their own.

Liquor is Best

There are few problems that can't be solved with a bottle of booze, and this is especially true of The Witcher 3. Tracking down ingredients for potions, oils, and grenades can be a real pain. Fortunately, you only have to craft each of them once. Having a bottle of hard liquor in your inventory while meditating will restore your entire potion supply, even the explosives, without requiring all the ingredients. That really is some magic booze. What exactly is Geralt doing while he's meditating, anyway?

Geralt is Medieval Batman

Witchers are supposed to be monster hunters, but people generally treat them as all-purpose detectives. Got a missing wife, daughter, or goat? Geralt is on the case. His Witcher senses allow him to pick up tracks and traces of blood to follow, just like a certain Dark Knight. But Witchers might be the superior investigative agency, since they can manipulate minds during interrogations. Most quests may end with some sort of monster confrontation, but that doesn't change the fact players spend much of the time looking for someone or something, and often have to locate someone else before they can find what they're searching for. At the rate people tend to go missing, business should be booming at the Witcher Detective Agency, and there's no better use for those heightened Witcher senses than to locate a frying pan. 

The World is Addicted to Gwent

Forget about how the world is being tossed down the latrine. Don't mind the fact that there's a malignant monster lurking at night, that bandits are camped nearby, or that here are fields where corpse eaters are feasting on piles of dead soldiers. Throw down some cards and play some Gwent, the hottest card game in the empire. The rules are simple, but the game can be very difficult to win, and practically every merchant, barkeep, or someone with some money to lose is willing to play. So, give the sword swinging a rest. Gwent could be the best way to earn a little extra gold. If only you could cheat by hiding extra cards up your sleeve or distracting opponents with your fantastic beard.

Bandits like to Fight in Their Underwear

We get that times are tough, but at least put on some pants. The land is full of bandits that love fighting in little more than their skivvies, shoes, and a helmet. This is either an audacious act of intimidation to show that they don't need armor to fight you, or it's a clear sign that there's not much on them worth looting. Either way, naked bandits are abound, and it's up to you to teach them the merits of wearing pants. Then again, there's a scene where Geralt fights wearing just a bath towel, so maybe we shouldn't be so judgmental.

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From The Chatty
  • reply
    May 25, 2015 9:00 AM

    Steven Wong posted a new article, 5 Strange Things to Love About The Witcher 3

    • reply
      May 26, 2015 6:59 PM

      Seriously, am I the ONLY one who has huge problems with this game? Do NONE of the reviewers have issues with the sluggish controls and stuttering camera movement?

      • reply
        May 27, 2015 1:16 AM

        Must be your system, it runs extremely smooth on mine with all high / ultra settings. since the latest patch I have not had a stutter yet.

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