Parents hire Fortnite coaches for their kids because we live in ridiculous times

Like DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince told us, parents just don't understand.


Do you suck at Fortnite? Do you need Mommy and Daddy to hire a coach to make you suck less at Fortnite? That's what's going on in our country and likely around the world, too. According a report by The Wall Street Journal, parents are paying up to $20 an hour (I'm sure some are paying more) to help their kids improve their Fornite skills.

You see, Fortnite has become so much of a smash hit that it's created something of a status quo with kids and teenagers, many of whom aren't even old enough to be playing the game in the first place, but that's beside the point. It's gotten to the point that apparently kids are being bullied because they just don't play the game that well, as hard as that is to believe.

“There’s pressure not to just play it but to be really good at it,” said one parent Ally Hicks. The report states that she spent $50 on four hours of lessons for her 10-year-old son to brush up on his Fortnite skills. “You can imagine what that was like for him at school.” No, Ally, no I can't. Because that's literally insane. It's actually ludicrous.

As you're no doubt aware, Fortnite's Battle Royale mode thrusts 100 players into one enormous arena, with one objective: emerge victorious and snag a Victory Royale as the last one standing. It's gotten so ridiculously popular that it's just about anyone talks about these days.

Curbing bullying is definitely a goal we should all strive for, but it doesn't really look like this is the best way to approach doing so. Maybe some measures should be taken to teach kids that losing in a video game isn't everything, just like the lessons some adults need to learn? Just throwing that out there. That'd be progress, not rising to meet some random challenge other kids are throwing out at not-so-talented teen Fortnite players.

Senior Editor

Fueled by horror, rainbow-sugar-pixel-rushes, and video games, Brittany is a Senior Editor at Shacknews who thrives on surrealism and ultraviolence. Follow her on Twitter @MolotovCupcake and check out her portfolio for more. Like a fabulous shooter once said, get psyched!

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