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http://break.com/index/barf-bags-dont-work-at-0-gs.html
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1st time I was ever in a plane. A buddy of mine (lets call him Dave) had his pilot's license for a while. A friend of his (lets call him Bob) came into town and wanted to go up in a Cessna. He asked if i wanted to go too, sure!
So me, and my girlfriend at the time showed up at the Air Port to meet Dave and Bob. We get in the plane and take off, it was awesome. We get to about where the Sunshine Skyway bridge is in south St. Pete (Florida) and Dave was all like "Hang on, gonna make a sharp turn!" SWEET!! He did a hard bank and we circled the bridge.
Now, Me and my girlfriend were in the back seat, it was basically a 4-seater, with Bob in the front with Dave. Well, turns out Bob had a weak stomach. As we leveled out, he started to open the side window, and Dave's like "Uh oh, you gonna puke?" and he reached for a small compartment where there were some barf bags. He was too late. Bob proceeded to lean in for the money shot, but didn't quite get to the window. He began to empty his stomach of it's contents, which consisted mostly of Spaghetti, and various other things that he ate at a buffet right before arriving at the airport. The window was open, so the air rushing is forcefully threw all the bile and puke right in my face in the back seat. This went on for about 20 seconds it seemed. I was completely covered in it. From head to toe.
So, Dave decided to head back. Bob left the window open because of the stench, no one complained. I just sat there in awe, still confused by what happened, watching the 12 gallons of gut juice drying on me everywhere..
Then about 5 minutes before landing, Dave hit some choppy air. Bob had a barf bag in his hand, but didn't realized it. He began to puke again, out the window, but not really because it all just made a 90 degree turn and went right for my face once again. At this point, I couldn't do anything but think of the different way I could kill this fucker.
We finally landed. Dave and Bob got out. Bob ran right for the terminal to hit the bathrooms for more tummy fun. Dave walked around the plane and helped me and my girlfriend out, she had some on her too, but nowhere near the amount on me. I was ground zero. Dave laughed for a good 20 minutes.
Then my girlfriend refused to drive me home in her car, so I had to ride home with Dave, on his fucking motorcycle.
I swear, I wanted to kill someone. I spent a good 2 hours in the shower, and went through 2 bars of soap to get it all off. Gets me pissed just writing this out, and makes me want to find out where Bob is so I can gut him. I never saw him again after that day either.
grr.. The End.
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