The pivotal moment came during a conflict over the Well, SourceTV witnesses say, with the Shacknews squad boasting a 3-1 score over their inferior opponents. Nearly 60 Shacknews civilians turned out to spectate and lend their support.

Reports that Valve had won over the Shack in a blitzkrieg-like assault last September were later found to be a product of the regime's propaganda machine.

Though the vanquished bastard fascists have yet to unconditionally surrender, the quickly-retreating losers managed to issue a few parting remarks.

"We're nerfing demos now btw," said Valve's Erik Johnson, perhaps in response to the vicious exploits of war heroes NastyJack and Jackass.

"Those were the most intense, awesome games I've ever had," said the modest Jack. "I didn't even look at my score once, no one was concerned about it."

"we ban your account before the next match," replied a barbarous, incoherent Johnson.

Another battle is currently planned for Friday, according to Shack tactician trOmblyj.

War documentarian bcyde provided these combat images, with sergeon capturing the historic moment of triumph with this commentary-laden film:

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Notes: On the Shack team, expert spy CptTrips was joined by medics itsJeff, maldoror, and hamachi; heavies Venguard and Zaun; Demomen NastyJack and Jackass; Pyro trOmblyj; engineer noobja; and soldiers nyranger66 and Harvester. While some sources claim that Valve won a round of Granary, this fact is currently disputed by Shacknews Minister of Information Nick Breckon.