7 Tower Thoughts - Telesto

Telesto has taken over everything and everyone, including Xur.


Okay, Guardian, this was an interesting week in Destiny 2. Telesto has taken over, Iron Banner is coming back, and I was all kinds of wrong about this week’s Trials map. Let’s dig into some thoughts on what’s been going down in Destiny 2 lately.


Earlier this week, the community exploded at the hint of a puzzle or secret mission related to Telesto. Guardians began to see in-game changes to the often-broken Exotic Fusion Rifle. Telesto had an alternate firing mode that had some members of the Destiny 2 community looking for astronomers in their Twitch chat. Telesto took over DIM, Light.gg, and the Destiny 2 Twitter account. In-game messages popped up, and Banshee-44 was clearly compromised. The only thing Telesto hasn’t taken over is actual Twitter, which would probably be an upgrade over Elon if it were to happen.

Now that we’re at the end of the week, it appears there’s nothing more to see from Telesto (for now). You can redeem an emblem (9LX-7YC-6TX) at Bungie’s code redemption page, but there appear to be no puzzles or secret missions if you believe what you read in Bungie’s most recent TWAB.

There will be members of the community upset that this wasn’t more, but this is no reason to be upset. This was just a little fun to make a few days at the end of a Destiny 2 season a little more interesting. Not everything can be a giant puzzle or a new secret mission. We all love those, but there’s nothing wrong with enjoying a few days of social media shenanigans and getting a free emblem. Nothing wrong with watching Aztecross lose his mind trying to track projectile patterns that we thought were constellations. It’s okay to love puzzles and secret missions but still just look at what happened in Destiny 2 this week and think, “That was fun,” and move on.

This week’s Trial’s map

This week’s Trials map is Cauldron, which means that my prediction was wrong. Last week, I wondered if we’d end up with Anomaly as our Trials map simply because it was stuck on the left side of the voting image in the email sent to Guardians. I even voted for Anomaly in a feeble attempt to see my prediction come true. Well, it wasn’t to be, as Cauldron won the vote and my hypothesis proved incorrect.

Iron Banner returns

The Iron Banner is back next week with more Eruption. While I do enjoy that game mode and the Iron Banner in general, there is nothing for me there. I’ve gilded my Iron Lord title, acquired all the weapons and armor I want, and reached the Power cap. The Iron Banner really needs Adept versions of some of its weapons, possibly available when you get the title, gild the title, or reset your Iron Banner rank. We don’t have to go crazy here; Iron Banner isn’t Trials. But maybe have one weapon Adept during the first event of the season, and another for the second event. There just needs to be a good reason for folks who crushed all their Iron Banner objectives during the first event to return for the second.

How hard are Grandmaster Nightfalls?

I came across a subreddit post asking how hard GMs really are, and I feel I’m in a good spot to answer this question. See, I was previously someone who had never tried a GM but had listened to all the folks talking about how hard they were. The truth is, Grandmaster Nightfalls aren’t nearly as unapproachable as some Guardians let on. Yes, there’s the nonsense Power gate that Bungie needs to do away with, but once you’re eligible to play them, they are doable. Well, most of them are doable. There are still brutally difficult GMs but not all of them.

Grandmaster Nightfalls require some planning, build crafting, and knowledge of the formula for whatever GM you’re trying to knock out. In most cases, there are nifty little tricks that you never knew existed. Most of us are conditioned to mindlessly go through Strikes not thinking, missing so many cool details that can make our lives easier. You learn the conditions that cause enemies to spawn, where to engage from, and you really lean into weapon rolls and, in my case, crafting. My favorite reason to craft weapons in Destiny 2 is for use in GMs.

GMs are not as hard as people let on, but they do require you to be at the top of your game if you’re not a highly skilled player. Once you know how much damage you can take and start to get comfortable, you’ll be shrugging off the idea that something like The Devi’s Lair is tough. You’ll be stockpiling Ascendant Shards and Adept weapons in no time. If you know folks that can get into GMs with you, that’s the best way, but even LFG will do. At this point, most people on LFG are farming Grandmaster Nightfalls because completing them is a forgone conclusion.

Loyal to the Vanguard, or…?

A press image showing Caiatl in Destiny 2

Source: Bungie

Follow my train of thought here, Guardian. Aztecross did a video where he ranked the waifus in Destiny 2. That doesn’t interest me much, but what his video did do was demonstrate how many awesome female characters there are in Destiny 2. It’s well known in my fireteam that I’m loyal to Caiatl, Ada-1, Failsafe, and Mara Sov long before the Vanguard. It’s also well known that all Guardians would die for Eido, Daughter of Misraaks. She must be protected at all costs.

It’s not about the Vanguard lacking, it’s about recognizing the strength of all these other characters. I recall when people used to shrug the Destiny story off, but we find ourselves at the end of 2022 and immersed in this world full of interesting characters and storylines, and a decent amount of those characters aren’t men, which quite frankly is refreshing. Honestly, though, if I had to choose between Caiatl and Ada-1, I don’t think I could do it. Ada-1 brought me some of my favorite weapons and armor ever, but Caiatl would be fun to go to war with.

Let Datto into your vault

Datto has been doing a series for some time where prominent members of the community let him purge their vault. If you haven’t seen it you need to watch a few of them, because what it demonstrates more than anything is that we don’t need more vault space; you’re all just a bunch of hoarders. There is help, Guardian. You don’t have to live this way.

Anyway, Datto made a few surprise visits to folks who let him into their vault previously just to see if they have slipped back into their old ways. Toss it on a second monitor while you play (or while you work) and enjoy. Datta, Hero of the Vaults.

Esoterickk cannot be stopped

This video is from a couple of weeks ago, but Esoterickk did something crazy, even by his own standards. The Destiny 2 solo guru went ahead and completed a Master Nightfall without using movement inputs. Most Guardians can’t do a solo Legend Nightfall with no restrictions, let alone a solo Master, or a solo Master without movement inputs. At some point he’s got to hit some kind of a skill ceiling, right?

Well, I’m out of here, Guardian. Don’t forget to snag your Telesto emblem and try out some GMs if you have the fireteam to do so and have been holding off. Maybe watch a video first, or read a guide, but give it a go.

Managing Editor

Bill, who is also known as Rumpo, is a lifelong gamer and Toronto Maple Leafs fan. He made his mark early in his career through guide writing and a deep understanding of editorial SEO. He enjoys putting in the work to create a great content, be it a wild feature or grinding out an in-depth collectible guide. Tweet him @RumpoPlays if you have a question or comment about one of his articles.

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