Ever wondered howa questing adventurer would fare in the real world? You know, the characters in RPGs who actually gain fame and glory by delivering messages to people and killing rats. John Walker points out many of the odd conventions of roleplaying game quests, both of the single player and MMO variety. Most of his observations are ones that have been made countless times before on lists with names like "Everything I Need to Know, I Learned From RPGs," but Walker does them one better by actually going out and attempting to find an adventurer to carry out his vitally important delivery quest.

The plan: To take to the streets, dressed as a wizard, with a quest for the good peoples of Bath, England.

Would they really help out a stranger with a strange beard? Would they even stop to listen? Is there any truth to this convention we've otherwise entirely accepted?

First of all, I should immediately get this out of the way: No one, at any point, approached me to ask for a quest. Short of suspending a yellow exclamation mark above my head, I'm not sure what more I could have done to attract the attention of any passing adventurers braving the cold thoroughfare through the centre of the town. If anything, people did their very best to avoid me, refusing eye contact, moving far away from my pleading face. It was already concerning.

Walker ended up having to actively solicit the help of passing adventurers, rather than being himself solicited as he expected, but he managed to get a couple takers. The world may yet be safe another day.