Quakecon Ultra Extra Evening Reading for you. There's no way it could have been avoided, sorry! First, there's like a ton of other gaming news out there but a) I'm tired and b) nobody really cares at the moment so we'll just leave that for tomorrow or something.

And there have been a monstrous amount of ER submissions tonight (thanks!) - unfortunately too much to be included in one edition. Here's the editors pick for today:

• Trust the healing power of the penis! Or not. Fuck the doctor first, then sue for sexual assault. Best of both worlds if you ask me.
• San Fransico isn't exactly cheap, that's nothing new. So you are a well paid air traffic controller, what do you do to make ends meet? You start to rob banks. Ofcourse.
• I know you all have been waiting for something as big as this: A NFS (NES sound format) plugin for winamp! Yay!
• Check out this poor polar bear. He's hot and is taking a nap on a block of ice.
• Oh my! The chicks are totally going to dig this guy. And imagine the fun you could have with TWO of these arms!
• Picture this: You're totally into bondage, and playing some games with your favorite human. Then, suddenly the cops show up. I tell you ... that is not good for your reputation as respectable sheep.
• British people are weird. And why ask the children? There are enough big boned people in britain who could do a whole lot more damage then a bunch of featherlight kids!
• French people are even weirder. And I have no doubt they're very good at imitating pigs.
• There's also some cnn coverage of quake 4.

Special sniffs to Dognose, and the other contributors: MrShmoo, Goofyboy, Zoesch, jo-papa, and others I forgot.

And oh, this queer version of ER is dedicated to my copy of Win2K, that decided to crash the second before I tried to post the original version of this article.