First 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand Media Is Veiny; Publisher Promises 'Ultimate' 50 Cent Experience
"50 Cent: Blood on the Sand will have everything my fans are looking for in a 50 Cent game," said 21st century warrior-poet 50 Cent.
Developed by Swordfish Studios and reportedly inspired by Epic Games' Gears of War (PC, X360), 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand arrives on PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360 this fall. According to Sierra, the game will feature aerial combat, driving, interactive counter-kills, co-op play, and unreleased 50 Cent music.
"Gamers will be excited that 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand will provide the ultimate 50 Cent next-gen game experience," added Sierra marketing VP Al Simone.
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Retarded Developer: "So, you've seen how well Halo's been doing right? The Halo series has ended, and everyone's scrambling to find the new Halo. They all have these new characters right, but none of them is cool enough to fill Mister Chef's shoes... EXCEPT FOR ONE. Introducing '50 Cent: Shit Hits the Motherfucking Fan.' It has the shooting experience that made Halo so popular, with the... uh... 50 Cent experience that made... 50 Cent so popular."
Retarded CEO #1: "I don't think 'shit hits the motherfucking fan' is very kid-friendly. We want lots of kids to by our game so we can line our solid gold wallets with even more cash."
Retarded CEO #2: "What's the story about?"
Retarded Developer: "Shit, that's the best part! 50 Cent is playing at a concert in the middle east (for some reason) and it's totally sold out. But then the bitch of a concert coordinator doesn't give fiddy his green, so 'Cent goes on a straight rampage! Killing the innocents and stealing the cash from their bullet and blood ridden bodies!"
Retarded CEO #1: "I love the political commentary! How about we change the name to 'Blood in the Sand!'"
Retarded CEO #2: "QUACK, QUACK, QUACK!"
Retarded CEO #1: "That means he likes it!"
Retarded Developer: "Sounds awesome! Yeah, you can just make that check out to 'cash'."
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