Ordyne Virtual Console Review

Originally released only in Japan for TurboGrafx-16, September 1989 Wii Points: 600 ($6) Review it yourself

A few weeks ago, I stated in my review of Gradius III that the addition of simultaneous co-op play could really extend the life of a scrolling shooter. I have since discovered that this is not true. Namco's Ordyne, a sidescrolling shooter with whimsical graphics and perhaps the most annoying pause sound effect ever created for a video game, does in fact feature simultaneous cooperative play--but it is far from enough to save a gaming experience that is mediocre at best. Ordyne assigns players the role of Yuichiro Tomari, a scientist whose fiance has been kidnapped by the diabolical Dr. Kubota. Being an upstanding husband-to-be who refuses to stand for actions such as mad doctors kidnapping his girl, Tomari and his sidekick Sunday Chin hop in planes to go rescue her. I mention the story only because it is a humorous change of pace from the back story of most scrolling shooters. It sets the tone for the game's colorful and decently executed graphics, which if nothing else provide a memorable canvas on which to paint a trying gameplay experience. Ordyne's sidescrolling levels allow one or two players to fly around and blast everything that moves. This is where my problems began. The default cannon blast is powerful enough, but features a sound effect so grating that I decreased my television volume to the point where I could barely hear the game. The rest of the sound effects do not fare much better, especially Pause, which sounds like an amateur tuba player belting out a single note as he is hit by a car. Fortunately, the music is better, featuring a cheerful cross of tunes that might have come from a hybrid of Super Mario Bros. and Mega Man. Shooting complete waves of enemies and other lone foes will net players crystals, which serve as the game's currency. Sporadically, an item ship will fly by, and players can enter it to stock up. These item pit stops offer a good deal of strategy to the game--only one item can be purchased each time. The items are the usual assortment of scrolling shooter fare: large blasts that fire from front and rear cannons, a speed boost, rapid fire. These items have a limited use duration. Players only keep their weapons for twenty to thirty seconds, at which point the ships revert to the default cannon fire and its annoying sound effect. Getting hit causes players to lose a life and their weapon, just as in most shooters of this type, but losing a weapon for simply surviving is extremely aggravating. Staying alive is relatively simple, more so than it should be in a scrolling shooter. While Gradius III's level of difficulty can be too high, Ordyne's is far too low at most points. Some areas feature only one or two moderately tough enemies to kill, which is easy enough with the default cannon or the infinite missiles stocked inside players' ships. Some of these desolate areas appear after players have emerged from an item ship, which means the clock on those easily-earned items is ticking but there's nothing to shoot. The addition of cooperative play makes the game even easier, making these areas quite boring as both players are waiting for more enemies to appear. When enemies do appear, it is important to know the lay of the land, which features dangerous terrain that can cause unaware pilots to crash and burn as they are shooting and evading. Unfortunately--and maddeningly--the entire landscape is not visible all at once, resulting in instances where there were actually heavily populated, hostile areas around which I had to do some skillful dodging and weaving. These action movie-esque scenes ended abruptly as I flew into previously unseen obstacles such as lava, stalactites, and other somewhat-hidden obstructions down below. That was lots of fun. Ordyne is a game that is best left alone. Cooperative play may have been a saving grace if many areas of the levels were not so slow to populate, but even if they were brimming with bad guys, players would still spend most of their time listening to the annoying screech of the default cannon blast. There are plenty of options available on the Wii's Virtual Console for scrolling shooter fans--R-Type, Super R-Type, and the excellent Gradius III. Play one of those instead. Go back for Chris Faylor's review of Final Fight.