The Annoying Future

I propose a theory for all the internet ad execs that see this page: A bigger ad correlates to a more effective ad... but correlation is not causation! A *COOLER* ad is a more effective ad. If your adspace is so small that you can only print the name of your product then nobody will care. Make your ad cool (this does take some webpage realestate) and people will pay attention. People always talk about superbowl ads. Are they longer? I have no idea. People watch them because they're cool. I go to www.bmwfilms.com and watch 6 min. ads. Why? They're cool as shit! I want to buy a BMW.

Make your ads as cool as those and they'll get noticed. Put up an ad that is like all the ones I see today (dumb crap) and nobody will bat an eye. Put up an add that makes sound and everyone will talk about how much you suck, but nobody will remember what you are selling.


Have you noticed the talk about web ad revenue drying up? Does this mean that web advertisements don't work?

No.

This means that people are selling donkey shit on the web because the (failed) web boom told them they could make money at it. So all these retarded-ass web banners started showing up for stuff I didn't want. Did I click on them? No. I don't want to find out about e-donkey-shit.com. Neither did anyone else - and e-donkey-shit.com closed down and had to move out of that big assed office they rented in Texas. The web boom has failed - is it any wonder that the advertisments for it got ignored?
Nobody wanted to order pet food on line - is it because the ads didn't work? NO! IT'S BECAUSE IT WAS A STUPID, CRAPPY IDEA!

Are you a company considering using web based advertising? Wondering if it actually works? Go through this checklist:
Do people want my product?
Do people have a reason to delay gratification thru the mail rather than go to a physical store where they can see and touch the product they want to buy?
Is my ad pleasing to look at?

If you answer these questions "yes" -- honestly here -- then congratulations, you will succeed.
If you answer any of these questions "no" -- ANY OF THEM -- then you should have a time out in the corner to think about what you have done.

DON'T BE CONFUSED!! Web advertising is cheaper to place than TV ads, but the audience is both more sophisticated and more fickle (sp?). A lower bar to entry allows ineffective companies to skew advertising data to appear less effective than it is. Rule of thumb: Don't try to sell crap.

In conclusion:
A certain amount of adspace is required for an ad to make a compelling visual presentation.
A larger version of a crappy ad for a worthless product which I can impulse buy across the street if I need to will not help you any more than a small version of said ad.


Adam

Steve,

Hmmm, I think this story is a bit disingenuous on your part. You speak about the "annoying future," as if ads were an annoyance, and that's kind of a man-of-the-people pose. But in actuality, your site censors information about ad blocking software. Trying to have it both ways? Dissing ads in news stories, then imposing them upon peeps anyway?

Mind, I admit that if I were running a site, I'd impose ads, too. I just wouldn't pretend to gripe about them. :)

Hmmm. Just in case nobodies sure what to do about this:
DON'T ANYONE EVER CLICK AN AD ON THE INTERNET EVER AGAIN AS LONG AS THEY LIVE!!!}y]b

Unless its on the Shack, right Steve?

This story makes baby Jesus cry.

I swear to God if my marketing degree ever gets me a job in internet marketing I will ban the use of pop up ads.

I conducted a report myself..

adds that flash were effectivly more gh3y than the ordinary ones, on average 33.6% more
those that made noise inspired homicidal tendancies, on average 76% of those who encountered them said they would enjoy slowly putting something blunt throught the eye-ball of the person responsible for them.
the survey subject agreed unanimously that the most annoying form of banners were those found mostly on war3z pages, the pyramid banner, the kind that spawn another 5 when closed which in turn spawn another 5 and so on... the survey showed that these banners had an annoyance factor of 100% but an effectivness factor of only 40% as they were only clicked by dumbasses.

I posted this before but I think it applies here. Ign has decided that you don't really want to read their web page anymore.

http://rcmerritt.homestead.com/files/ign2.jpg

That ape got stuck on that page and I couldn't get rid of it fyi

I was going to post a link, then I remembered...

"Ad blocker information in any form will be nuked."

As long as Steve never allows sound 'enhanced' banners. Fucking Quake3World had a Navy banner for the longest time with a whistling theme....ARGH!

the vast majority of popup menus are invoked via javascript. disable javascript parsing on your browser to rid yourself of having to endure popup menus ...

In honor of this article, everybody should click a banner for steve today.

You know steve, if you would just carry porn banners all your money woes would cease. :)

Pikachu no! EPILEPSY ATTACK GO!

People actually click on ads intentionally? Holy crap! I never realized...

full screen adds will be out in the near future maybe 1-2 years
this is obviously going to fucking blow more :(
though it's not a add, but it shows what its like - go to http://www.nhl.com and on the left side click on 'nhl broadband'
full screen animation that could easily be an add considering how fast it pops up

I would pay to not have to view *any* ads online, but that's not going to happen unless a system is setup for all sites out there. Like a season pass to get into Six Flags.

Of course the 3 companies that did these little "reports" aren't at all interested in making money off of ads. Interactive Advertisers Bureau, DoubleClick and MSN.

I am just amazed it took all 3 to say that bigger gets more attention than smaller. They must have stolen all the great minds in todays world to crunch those numbers.

Talking about those X10 ad's, why are they on so many pages? Did the creators/owners of that X10 shiiiiiii pay to have their banner pop-up @ 90% of all the webpages or are they hax0rz?

Can someone explain how they pull it of?

BECAUSE PEOPLE CLICK THEM ON ACCIDENT!

Those fucking things... I'll be fucking around, click a link, go back to doing something else... then the fucking ad pops up and it's like "GOD NO! NOT THE MILLION POP UP ADS!!!"

I hate spam.

bring em on bitch! i got adsubtract :)

I've probably clicked on about THREE banner ads in the last 5 or 6 years. Simple, if *I* want a product, I will seek it out. I do not appreciate shit being right there in my face. And, no, I rarely watch TV too

How much of that extra traffic is just mistaken clicking? I know that I accidently click the X10 ad sometimes just because it pops up while I'm surfing and not paying attention.

If this is happening, then the big ads don't really solve anything, do they? More traffic, but the same amount of business done.

Gamespy.com has a McDonald's ad that pops up right in the center of the screen. It's not a window, but a flash "bubble" that stays there for a few seconds and you can't click off. Incredbily irritating.

I propose that the internet change over to a system of linked ad-pages where you get pop-up web-site windows occasionally.

Yea I definetly like the tower ads. They are unobstrusive (sp) and also catch the eye pretty easy, at least better than banner ads.

Popup windows were created by the Nazis when they knew they were going to lose.

Why don't they just have invisible ads? Now that, I could live with. It would be genius!

TEH BANNER ADS MAKE BEHBEY JEBUS CRY!

I think that there are going to be a huge demand for ad killing software. I use one, it does okay... But I can't stand when an ad start making noise, or pop up. If it fux0rs my control/interface of the computer then those people can eat a big bucket of dicks.

All ads make me want to fucking PUKE

can there be a cpu usage restriction? nothing sucks more than watching my build grind to a halt because of the "shock the monkey" ads. browsing the shack is what i do when i'm waiting on something else at work...

'Web Ads Deemed Annoying, Study Reveals'

it's amazing what these studies can tell us, otherwise we would stay totally ingorant and uninformed as to whether ads. pissed us off

http://www.digitrends.net/mna/index_6423.html

rofl, while you read this wait for the most annoying ad ever

no shoot the monkey, pie the politician, kick the baby or shoot the chef ads.
As long as they arn't 'interactive' i'm happy...

well that sucks i guess

How fitting, as I left that page a popup came up.

Seriously, I don't really care too much about ads as long as the content stays free. Just don't do this:

1) Rape the CPU usage. Like that Monkey flash one we had a while back in 32-bit.
2) Sound. I like my web silent mostly, thanks. I also don't like browsing and leaving for a bit and come back to my computer telling me not to do drugs.

On the other hand, hearing Romero speak about not doing drugs must have done wonders...

Don't do drugs kids or you'll end up with hair like mine

i like the ads that have no border and always stay on top so you have to alt f4 them

Steve ... revenue-justification propaganda?? .. tsk tsk tsk

"...nothing that will cause seizures."

Do you mean like the [Domain Names one at godaddy.com] at the top of this page? ;)

Shock the monkey is the most effective banner ad ever, closely followed by ugo's "I can't believe it's not pr0n" ads.

sorry to hear its come to this

Steve fight the man!

aogm #1s!????@!!? mehe :P